This will be my last post of 2013. That's a crazy thing to say. I mean 2013 has been one hell of a year for me. And I've actually posted a lot to this blog this year. I hope that you all have enjoyed it as much as I've enjoyed writing it. And I know that it's a little puff piece that you read every once in a while, but I love writing that puff.
Fuck, I'm 29 years old!!! It's such a weird thing being in this place right now. I had no idea that on my 29th birthday I would be here in North Hollywood writing to you. To be honest I didn't think I would be here at all. Now that is another totally sad and well stupid story that I won't even go into, but I will say this. No matter what you think about yourself or your situation it gets better. If there is one thing I could say to anybody it would be that.
Now since my birthday is right after Christmas and right before New Year's I get to not only get those happy birthday/Christmas presents but I also get to deal with the fact that around this time of the year everybody is talking about how they are going to be their best self next year and they are going to change everything about the upcoming year.
Now it's a long running joke between me and one of my best friends CORY WILLIAMSON that on New Years we talk about how this next year is going to be our year. And how we are going to bend this year over and bang it into submission. We say this thing to each other every year and every year, the year ends up bending us over and banging us into submission. Like I said it's a long standing joke with us and we almost kind of enjoy how each year fucks us over.
But I'll tell you right here and now that I can safely say that 2013 was our year!!! I'm not one to ever sit around and brag about anything, but this has been such an amazing year. And not just for me, but for all of my friends and family. I will alway remember 2013 for as long as I live.
I'd like to sit here on this drunken night and talk about some of the ups and the reason why I'll always remember this year. This was the year that my best friend moved to Florida. I had made plans that at the beginning of 2013 I was going to fly the coup. But something held me in place and I waited until June, but in February CORY decided to take his talents to HOMOSASSA. I remember being so happy and jealous about it at the same time. And everybody I knew asked me how I was ever going to get along with Cory being gone. And now here we both are on different coast living our lives trying to make something of ourselves. And the crazy thing is that CORY WILLIAMSON is a true pioneer and I will see he as the captain of his own pirate ship one of these days.
A couple of my really good friends had babies this year. And really and truly what is more special than that. I mean for the rest of my life I get to think about all the crazy shit that we have done, and then say to myself, "that guy is a dad?!?" or "that girl is a mom?!?" And the thing is Cody and Amy, and Shea and Chrissi being parents suits you all. I mean every picture that I see that gets put up makes me more in love with those little ones.
Some of my friends celebrated their first year of marriage this year, which with the way that people are ping ponging around it is now some feet. But believe me they did it with ease. And right along side them there were a couple of friends that used 2013 as a time to get pregnant. And even though it was surprising they are both so incredibly happy.
I had a friend start flight school, a friend finish up with nursing school, and another finish up with grad school. And yet another one got married this year. My sister finally moved back home and even though she hates it became and OKIE all over again. Both of my parents got job promotions and my second parents bought some land and decided to build their very own dream house on it.
And I had yet another friend buy his very own and very first house. I talked to him earlier tonight and we got to talking and he said to me something I don't think I'll ever forget. He said to me, "Brandon it's funny, Baseball. a game of failure has led to all of my success." You see Mike is from Venezuela and he came here to play baseball. And because of baseball he got to go to college, and get is MBA and now be a land owner in America and let me just say that is pretty fucking cool. So for those of you that say that sports don't matter, FUCK YOU. They can change your whole life.
But really as I sit here still kind of surprise that I'm still awake and haven passed out yet, I just have to say that 2013 has been a pretty fucking spiritual year for me. I've done things I've never thought I would do and I've loved every minute of it. I finally got to go on my cross country road trip with my dad. And I really did have a blast. I grew a pair of balls and finally said bye bye to Oklahoma and hit that open road to California.
It was the scariest thing that I've ever done, but the most meaningful as well. Before I left Oklahoma I didn't think that my life had meaning. I didn't think that I was good enough. I didn't think that I was worthy. And I know that it might sound weird but that is really how I felt about myself. I felt as though I was an unworthy person that was really and truly letting my parents down for all they had sacrificed for me.
And when I got here, I felt more like myself than I have in so many years. I felt as though I was in the place I was meant to be and I was the person I was meant to be. I got to work on a movie set, with a world famous actress in Kristen Stewart. I've worked on commercials that have aired on TV and I've worked on television shows with a world famous scientist. I've done things that I really only could have dreamed of, and the thing about it is that I'm not done yet.
I am going to push myself to the limit of what is humanly possible for myself, because that is the only way that I know how to do things. God only knows where I will be 2 years down the line, but I know that right now I'm doing well, and my family and friends are doing well, and I'm just so damn happy to be alive.
I"m sorry this all sounds so random and crazy, but like said, I'm drunk so really and truly you can't hold it all aganist me.
I hope all can read this and I hope that it inspires you to step back and take a looke and your life and you're hopes and dreams that come flooding in don't just end up getting washed away.
I have nothing more to say but I love you all. And Sam you walk on a cloud of sunshine and you completely refresh everything that I am and that i want to be.
No comments:
Post a Comment