You know that nothing can could be better than this feeling people sometimes get, well let me just say that I have that feeling right now. Damn it's been a long time since I've had it but it is official, I have it and I don't think I'll let it go just yet. I mean in the last two weeks I've done more writing than I think I have in maybe the last six months. I really feel like I am on the top of my game in that department and I actually have a bit of a plan.
No my life isn't just heading in this great direction that is going to lead me to fame and fortune, but I is going in the direction that I want it to. It's been a while since I've gotten on here and written anything and tonight I had something around my neck and I realized that I had something to say.
So I have this necklace. And it is a very special necklace to me. It is a piece of my Aunt Ann and a piece of my mother. Probably the most important piece of jewelry that I have ever owned and I think of it that way. Some of you have probably seen me with it on and some of you have asked me about it before, but what you don't know is that until two days ago I decided to stop wearing it. I put in in a draw and more or less locked it away.
Why would I do such a thing you ask? Well let me tell you. I did it because I didn't think that I deserved to wear it. I didn't think I was good enough to, didn't think that I was man enough. I looked at myself in the mirror one day and I saw the necklace and thought to myself you are doing neither you're aunt or you mother justice by wearing this necklace and until you can turn it around you don't need to wear it.
It was pretty pathetic. Now I'm telling you this because there are probably a lot of you out there that sometimes feel this way about things, and maybe you don't want anyone to know and that's cool but let me just say that none of what you are thinking is true.
Two days ago a opened that draw looking for something and I saw that necklace and I took it out and put it on. I didn't have to think twice about it. Now my life isn't just this great change and I'm not out saving the world or doing something terrible great yet. But I'm different. I know I deserve to wear the necklace, because I know that my mom is proud of me and my aunt would be proud of me. I'm proud of me. You have to know deep down within your soul that you're good enough, no matter how many people out there make you think that you're not and believe me there will be people that make you think this. And some of them might be the closet people in the world to you. It's hard sometimes believe me I know.
But things get better you just have to push through it all sometimes. And then maybe if your lucky you'll me someone or have some people around you that make you feel like anything is possible like I do. Because everyone that comes in and out of your life it is all for a reason. they are there to make you the person that you are this very day. And you know what I happen to like that person. I can't put this into words enough but to say that no matter what happens you are worthy of the greatness you aspire to, and if you don't aspire to it now then start because the world needs so much more of it.
Well I hope you read this and I hope you take something from it. and until next time folks..... Don't start nothin' won't be nothin'.
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