CHEERS TO RACISM?

Well Folks you know who it is. Today I'm going to talk about something a little different. Sorry no movie reviews tonight, although next week should be full of them, so stay tuned for that. No today I'm going to talk about something different, something that has been bothering me all day but I just didn't know if I wanted to talk about it, because quite honestly it is something that is very personal and no matter how old I am or how long I've gone through it, it always hits home every time it happens.

I know you're on the edge of your seats waiting to hear exactly what I'm talking about so I guess I should just come out and say it. Today, in the we hours of the morning nursing the beginnings of a hangover after a fantastic night after the Sooners downed the Cowboys yet again, I silently endured some good old fashion racism. And this is that story.

So last night after a great night at Eskimo Joe's my good friend Cory and I were in no position to drive home, so being the mature and responsible(which we almost never are)people that we are we decided to crash at one of our other friend's Cousin's house. Now when we got there we were welcomed with open arms and we partied pretty much the rest of the night, and I didn't go to bed until probably 5 or 6 in the morning. It was in my opinion a pretty great night. And I enjoyed everyone there.

Then came the morning. To tell you the truth I really don't know who said it, because This place was pretty much your typical college guys house. It was a party house with an assortment of guys crashed out all over the house and I can pretty much picture that being the way it is most weekends. But in the early hours of the morning right before me and Cory left on our way home, I was just kind of waking up when I heard a couple of guys having a conversation. and it went a little something like this.

GUY1:"Man, what happened last night. I'm pretty sure after we took those twenty of thirty shots I blacked out." GUY2: "Yeah you were pretty much done by about 2 o'clock, we ended up saying up til about 6 I guess. It was a pretty crazy, this place is destroyed." GUY1: "I know, my parents came in here around 7:30 this morning and it looked just like this. did yall smoke some dank last night?" GUY2: "No, I drank a shitload but I don't remember anyone smoking last night." GUY1: "Well when my parents came in here this place smelled like straight dank. Maybe it was that NIGGER that pasted out on the couch. Wait where is he?" Guy2: "He's still laying right over there on the couch." GUY1: "Oh shit, Fuck I'm going back to bed."

You know it's funny, because no matter how many times I hear that word in my life, and I have heard it a time or two, I still feel so small under the power of it. And at that moment I just felt this thing come over my body and I didn't know what to do, all I could do is try to hold it all in, because I feel like if I let that part of my out then I will lose all control over myself. And I almost did this morning. I left that house and all I could feel was defeated. It sucks but I felt less than I know I am.

I debated on if I would write about this or not all day long, but in the end I decided I had to. I owed it to myself to let this all be known. To let people out there know that it isn't over and that there are still so many ignorant people out there. I want people to know that we as a country aren't past it even though some think that we are, and this is not okay. I am worth so much more than that, we all are. If you're reading this I hope you never know what something like this feels like, and I hope that we will all be more mindful of each other in the future, dare to dream right.

Until next time, Don't start nothin' won't be nothin'